Santa Claus is Coming to Town
by Arse Bottom
Summary: josuke gets some advice about his body image issues and he mopes around during christmas (also chubby josuke is the best josuke and ill fight anyone who says otherwise) i meant to finish this yesterday and upload it then but i didnt rip me


Christmas Eve in Morioh is always a good time. The shops and houses were all done up in festive reds and greens, and all the townspeople were getting things ready for Christmas dinners, and doing some last minute shopping. The whole town was practically buzzing for the arrival of Santa Claus. Two teenagers in particular, Josuke Higashikata and Okuyasu Nijimura, were waiting for the big man in red with bated breath.

"So, Okuyasu, what did you ask Santa for?" the chubbier one asked. Okuyasu scratched his head.

"Ah, it's nothing special. Just a PlayStation." Josuke laughed.

"Really? JUST a PlayStation? I doubt that's the only thing on your list, man." Okuyasu hunched over, his hands deep in his pockets.

"Nah, man... It's nothing..." he muttered. Josuke cocked an eyebrow, and he backed off. The curiosity was nagging at him incessantly, but he could see that it was something that Okuyasu didn't want to really discuss. In the spirit of Christmas, he decided not to pry.

"Well... My mom and me are throwing a Christmas party tonight... Wanna come?" Josuke asked, trying to simultaneously lighten Okuyasu's spirits and change the subject. He put on a half hearted smile.

"Sure," he replied. At least that was something for the both of them to look forward to between now and Christmas. Josuke felt the mood change instantly. Tonight's gonna be a fun night.

"Yeah, my dad keeps trying to come over too, but his wife keeps beating him every time he mentions me. Man, Italian chicks are scary sometimes, like you should've HEARD her screaming when he called," Josuke rambled on, as the two continued their walk to Josuke's house. Josuke's concentration on his ramble about elderly Italian women was broken by a small voice coming from behind him.

"Hey Josuke! Okuyasu!" the voice exclaimed. The two boys stopped and looked around to find the voice's source. Nobody could be seen. "Down here! It's me, Koichi!" Josuke looked down to find a short, pudgy blond boy.

"Oh, hey, Koichi," Josuke said. "What's up?"

"Just trying to get away from Rohan, he's been hounding me all day," Koichi sighed. And as if saying the name were some sort of summoning spell, Rohan strolled up to the group of teenagers.

"Hello Koichi, Okuyasu," he said. "... and Josuke," he added with a touch of venom to his words. "Talking about your made up Santa Claus?"

"Hey, fuck off. I've seen Santa before. He's real! AND he has a Stand!" Josuke yelled. Rohan's face twisted into some sort of expression that was a mix between laughter and mild disgust.

"Sure he is. And I'm the tooth fairy," he sneered. "Santa's not real, he's just a little fairy tale made up by your parents. You should be-" Josuke grabbed the wiry mangaka by his shirt and summoned his Stand, Crazy Diamond.

"Santa. Is. Real." Josuke hissed. "I saw him with my own two eyes! I swear it on Crazy Diamond's healing powers! He's real as you or me!" Rohan pushed himself out of Josuke's grip and he readjusted his coat.

"Jesus, and I thought fat people were supposed to be jolly..." he said, poking at Josuke's big, soft midsection. Josuke punched his hand away, growling. His weight was a little bit of a sensitive topic, but not as sensitive as his hair. Crazy Diamond took Rohan's headband and broke it to pieces, then it was restored to a broken distorted shape. Okuyasu wrapped his arms around Josuke, and he used his Stand, The Hand, to hold Crazy Diamond back.

"Come on, man. Let's go. Forget about him," Okuyasu said, attempting to calm Josuke down. The 3 teens shuffled away to Josuke's place, leaving Rohan behind to throw a hissy fit over his broken headband in the cold street.

"Damn, I fucking HATE Rohan," Josuke sighed in exasperation, sinking into a chair once they arrived at his house. "'I thought fat people are supposed to be jolly' like for shit's sake." Okuyasu was trying to search for words to calm him down, but he was at a loss. He gave Koichi a look, asking for help. Koichi thought of what to say.

"Look, Josuke... You're not really FAT..." Josuke shot him a piercing look, his Stand's pink fist, appeared, trembling in anger. Beads of sweat appeared on Koichi's forehead. "L-Look, what I'm saying is... You wear it well! It looks good on you!" Josuke narrowed his eyes in confusion. Okuyasu took the opportunity to chime in.

"Yeah, bro! I've seen you plenty without your jacket, you look really good!" he said, his hands gesticulating madly. Josuke looked down, biting his lip. His weight was always an issue to him, as he never did like it, but he never could seem to shake off his weight. Josuke was always a chubby kid growing up, and he was teased for it by other kids. That teasing was a source of self consciousness, and he had tried his hardest to lose weight, but nothing worked. Eventually, he just took to wearing baggy clothes trying to hide it all, and that worked to an extent. Okuyasu put one of his hands on Josuke's leg. "Dude, it looks good on you. Hell, it looks CUTE on you. I like it, and if you think that means nothing, then whatever. But I like it and I like you for it. Just remember that." Okuyasu said, looking right in Josuke's eyes. That was the kicker. He knew that he was being sincere. Josuke's eyes started to tear up.

"Yeah, yeah... It means a lot, man." He wiped his eyes, and he smiled. Tomoko called to Josuke.

"Hey! The Christmas party's starting soon! I hope you're ready!" she said. The boys had forgotten about the party entirely. Josuke rushed upstairs and changed into his red sweater, and Okuyasu and Koichi took their coats and put them on the coat hanger by the front door. There was a knock at the door, and Tomoko answered. A tall, muscular man in a white coat and matching cap stood at the door.

"Josuke called my cellular and told me about this. I hope you don't mind me joining." he said.

"No, not at all! It's good to see you again, Jotaro." Tomoko replied. Jotaro stepped in, Tomoko closed the door behind him. Jotaro summoned his Stand, Star Platinum, and spoke through it to Josuke.

"You wanted to talk to me about something?" he asked. Crazy Diamond was out in view, and the only other Stand users, Okuyasu and Koichi were too busy talking to each other about Josuke to notice that they had their Stands out.

"Yeah, but can we take this outside? I don't want Okuyasu or Koichi to overhear us using our Stands to talk," Josuke replied. Jotaro and Star Platinum nodded, and Jotaro withdrew Star Platinum. Josuke withdrew Crazy Diamond. "Could you excuse us for a second?"

Exiting the living room, and then the house through the front door, Josuke made sure that only he and Jotaro could hear what they were going to discuss. Jotaro lit a cigarette and offered one to Josuke who declined.

"What's the big deal?" he asked, blowing smoke.

"Well, you're like a big brother to me, y'know? I mean... TECHNICALLY I am your uncle, but I need some advice," Josuke asked, biting his lip. "I've been struggling with my body image, and it's really starting to eat at me." Josuke put both of his hands on his stomach, jiggling it slightly to emphasize his point. Jotaro took a long drag of his cigarette, thinking deeply.

"... And?" Jotaro finally replied, taking another long drag.

"Well, I was hoping you'd give some sort of advice to me about how to deal with it?" Josuke said, looking down and scratching the back of his head. Jotaro stamped out his cigarette.

"Gimme a break..." he muttered under his breath. "Look at this, Josuke." Jotaro lifted his shirt up, revealing a soft chubby stomach similar to Josuke, but it was a bit smaller. "The key is not to care." Josuke's mouth was agape.

"You say that like it's easy! I've always been a fat kid!" Jotaro was in the process of tucking his shirt back in and readjusting everything.

"So was I. I've just learned to not care about what people think," Jotaro said, straightening his vest. Josuke's pompadour began to open and spike up, he was working himself into a fit of anxiety and anger.

"But, have you ever had to deal with this shit for your whole life? I'm bigger than you are, and I hate it! I can't hide it at all, and now that Rohan's been fucking with me about this it's even worse! I can't stand it! I just can't!" Josuke was ranting on and on, and Jotaro put both of his hands on Josuke's shoulders.

"Look at me. You've done so much for Morioh, do you think that your weight made any of those things less valid? You killed Yoshikage Kira, an extremely infamous serial killer, and the world can rest easier now because of it. You dispatched Angelo, a lesser known criminal, but he was just as dangerous. You've done so much. I was there, and I respect you immensely for it. The town respects you. Your weight has no bearing on this, Josuke. Just learn to put it behind you, and focus on the positives of what you've done." Josuke calmed down, and smoothed his hair back into place.

"You're right. It's Christmas, and I need to learn to ignore it. Thanks, Jotaro," he said, smiling.

The party was over, and everyone who was there had gone home. Josuke was in the shower, washing out his hair gel and hair spray, and Tomoko was heading to bed. Josuke was lathering shampoo into his hair, and he was having an inner monologue. _Okuyasu thinks that it looks good, and Jotaro says that I should ignore it. But I'm just so... big. My mom hasn't told me to get off my ass and do some exercise, so maybe it's really just nothing? _He rinsed the shampoo out of his hair, and he started to put conditioner in. _But I've been teased about it for years, and now Rohan's adding to it. But then again, I think that guy I saw years and years ago when I was developing my stand was also a big guy like me... It's hard to remember. Is it linked to him too? Did I want to be so much like him that I put on weight? I don't remember. _He rinsed his hair again and turned off the water. Josuke thoroughly dried his hair and his body, and he slipped on some boxers. He looked himself over in the mirror, gently grabbing and poking at his belly and chest. He squeezed his cheeks, and turned around to look at his back. The prominent star-shaped birthmark on the left-hand side of the nape of his neck was in full view, and he put a hand to it, thinking hard on what Jotaro said. Weight was really irrelevant when it came to what he's done for Morioh, wasn't it? He was always a big kid throughout the course of his bizarre adventures, and he managed to make the world safer by killing Yoshikage Kira, right? Maybe there was nothing to worry about when it came to matters of his stomach, after all. Josuke kept poking and prodding at his body fat, and deciding that maybe he could live with some extra pounds on his body after all. He certainly started to feel a lot better about his weight. He shut off the lights in the bathroom and made his way to his room. The digital alarm clock by Josuke's bed read 10:30 P.M.

A few hours had passed, and Josuke was just starting to get into deep sleep when he heard a loud thud from on top of the roof. Something heavy slid down, and he heard the front door open. He ran to the hall and looked at the hallway and peered out with Crazy Diamond, and he saw a large, round figure dressed in furs. Josuke started to bite his lip, and his fists tensed. The figure turned around, and Josuke, realizing he was wearing nothing but a pair of boxers, covered his chest with his crossed arms, and his face gained a red tint.

"Josuke Higashikata, why are you still awake? All good boys and girls are asleep by now." the figure said. Josuke wanted to yell, but he didn't want to wake up his mom.

"Who are you? Are you-?" Josuke started.

"Santa? Well yes, but I'm known by other names, like Kris Kringle, Father Christmas, St. Nickolas, and so on. But, yes. I am." Josuke was wary of the figure. He certainly looked the part, dressed in heavy red and white furs, and he had a big, bushy white beard and small round glasses perched on top of his round button nose.

"Prove it," Josuke whispered. Santa gave a hearty chuckle.

"Your name is Josuke Higashikata, born June 22, 1983. You're half-Japanese, your father, Joseph Joestar is an Englishman, your mother, Tomoko Higashikata, is Japanese and a teacher. You're friends with Okuyasu Nijimura and Koichi Hirose."

"What did Okuyasu ask you for?"

"Two things: A PlayStation, and something for you." The last piece of information threw Josuke for a loop.

"For me? What did he want for me?" Santa stroked his beard in thought.

"Well, he asked me if I could make you feel better about your body. He's noticed that you try and hide it a lot, and that you've been feeling really bad about it," Santa remarked, looking at Josuke's stomach. Josuke instinctively sucked his stomach in, as he was practically naked and still a little self-conscious about his body. "No need to hide it!" Santa laughed, his hands on his stomach. "Josuke, I've heard all about what you've done here. You've done extremely good things for Morioh, and although the means you used to get there are naughty list material, it's still good." Josuke chuckled sheepishly. "Now, I do believe your nephew already told you something similar, so I'll just cut this short. You and I are both big fellows, and we're both heroes to someone. Our weight shouldn't reflect what we've done if it makes someone's life easier or better. You're someone's hero, and if they think you need to lose weight to be a real hero, then you need to ignore them."

"You know what, Okuyasu told me that he likes it on me, and Jotaro and you told me that I did some good stuff and that I should just forget about my weight. I think that I'm finally over my body issues. Thanks, Santa!" Josuke said with a big toothy grin. Santa clapped a hand onto Josuke's shoulder.

"You're very welcome!" Santa said, pulling out a golden sleigh bell from his pocket and handing it to Josuke. "Here, this is for you. If you start to feel bad about your body, just give it a ring and think about what we've said tonight." Josuke held the bell and turned it in his hand, it rang gently as he did so. Santa put some presents under Josuke's Christmas tree and looked up at a clock on his wall. "Oh, goodness! I have lots of time to make up here, I must go!" Santa got up and left Josuke's house, calling out "Jingle Bell Rock!" as he did so. A Stand appeared beside him. Jingle Bell Rock was a tall, slender stand with a reindeer's head and a bright red nose, covered in brown fur and dressed in baggy, red and white pants that were similar to candy canes. He had bracelets and a criss-crossing harness adorned in golden sleigh bells similar to the one Santa gave Josuke. This Stand was the one Josuke saw when he thought he saw Santa those years ago, and that was the real kicker. Josuke finally knew Santa was real, and he stood in his house's doorway, waving at Santa as Jingle Bell Rock took hold of the sack of presents and Santa leapt into the air, using the powers of his Stand to fly off to deliver more presents to the kids and adults of the world. The biggest smile grew on Josuke's face, his chubby cheeks pushed higher and higher from the smile. He went inside and locked the door, thinking to himself, _Damn, this was the best Christmas I've ever had! Okuyasu is gonna get the biggest kiss from me tomorrow, and I'm gonna tell him all about Santa!_


End file.
